Ahhhh...Facebook memories. A reminder of who we were, what we looked like, the joy we were experiencing in life at some other point in it; basically some form of a lie.
At least for me anyway. You see, 10 years ago I was married, with three beautiful daughters who thought I hung the moon, a beautiful wife who herself ran our beautiful home, 3 acres and a pool for friends and family to enjoy ("Sanders Sunday" was a thing back in the day), I owned a successful promotional products company (insert shameless plug for RiverCity Sportswear), I was a Governor Appointee to a prestigious State Cancer Agency charged with designing + distributing a plan for spending $3Billion on cancer prevention and research funding;
I was for the most part, respected in my community and loved by my family.
Ahhhh...10 years ago.
Today? Well, Facebook struck a nerve. And not the "All the people fighting fake friends or losing family members over politics, or stupid (but fun to look at) bikini boat pics + and other dumb shit" sort of a nerve.
No...it was the "I was moved to tears" nerve that the Zuckerberg devil-child struck in me.
I was moved to tears at the loss I have experienced in the past ten years.
When this post was made, I was a newbie to FB. 1 like and 6 comments. I am Loved!
Waylon Payne (amazing musician) was playing at my favorite venue - The Saxon Pub (owned by one of the nicest, most genuine people in the world, Joe Ables) and my oldest daughter, Jenna had joined me (she has just turned 21) for a happy hour set.
It was a great night. I was happy.
Or so I thought.
Flash-forward 10 years:
I am divorced. I don't own a home. I had a falling out with the Saxon Pub over a small t-shirt order. I lost one of my best friends from the Sanders Sunday era to self induced alcohol poisoning and I lost the other best friend from same said era over a girl that neither one of us really liked or is even with, today.
I don't sit on any prestigious boards.
I don't own RiverCity Sportswear.
Waylon lives in Nashville and is writing and making music with the biggest stars in country music today. My oldest daughter is married to an amazing guy. My other two daughters are thriving and all three live in Austin! My ex-wife is married to a wonderful man, whom my kids love. Those are good things, don't get me wrong!
I do have my health, even if I am 15 pounds over my ideal fighting weight.
I do have some new best friends and many old ones.
However, I also noticed in this post a comment from Kim Morris-Ross. Sweet Kim.
Always positive and loving towards me.
Kim has passed from cancer.
My daughter Jenna chimed in on this post too, to do what all my daughters do so well; call me on my bullshit!
I noticed a comment from Racheal Brock (my adopted little sister.)
Racheal is a cancer survivor and NOW a Covid-19 survivor.
Yes, she's a fucking badass. And, yes, she calls me on my shit, too.
All bullshit aside, what I was felt when I saw this "memory" pop up was this:
The world is going to move on and life is going to do it's thing.
And it sucks sometimes.
And it's beautiful at others.
So now...I am going to do MY THING. And it will suck sometimes.
And it will be beautiful at others.
And if you never go, you'll never know.
Comments